Some people say that they feel guilty, shameful, or dirty after they masturbate, and so they conclude that masturbation must be a sin. This is just because most of us have been taught, often by misguided religious authorities, that our bodies are bad and anything relating to physical pleasure is sinful. This is simply not true, and this is not what God intended for us. God created our bodies, along with our capacity for sexual pleasure and orgasm. Masturbation is just a normal release of sexual energy, and if used properly, it can help keep us healthy physically and spiritually.

YES, that is yet another quote from those wacky churches!

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Jenna Jameson has to be doing something right if her porn career is covered by Forbes. It’s obvious that Jenna has established a very successful repertoire of sex related business ventures. She’s done it all. A hardcore website, moaning ringtones, raunchy videos, virtual sex DVD’s, and various toys (related to sex of course).

“I always wanted to be a star,” says Jameson, 31. “I’ve always embraced my hard-core roots, but becoming a household name was an important thing to me.”

Jenna is transforming herself from a idolized hardcore porn star into a successful business manager. I had no idea Jenna managed her own porn stars while raking in up to $4 billion a year in sales.

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At first I assumed the term infidelity had something to do with a males inability to procreate. The word actually means to be unfaithful.

If you’re significant other has been acting a little weird lately and you happened to notice a new stain on the sheets, SemenStain may or may not be able to put your worries at ease. Is that inconspicuous stain on the sheets, pillow case, and wall you noticed with the black light semen?! Does anyone keep a black light next to their beds to check the sheets before your guest comes? Leave it to the “experts” to decide. There could be a few valid explanations. The stain could be drool, a bleach stain, or… it could be the residual evidence left by the pool boy / mail man collecting their bonuses.

Send $10 and a sample of your evidence away to be analyzed by SemenStain. Chances are your $10 is gone and a pimple faced kid will send you a hand written note on a napkin with the words “douche bag” to you.

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Care to join the fun? Instead of responsibly tossing that gum into the trash can, mold and shape it until it resembles a nipple. Then slap that sucker on random objects around the city.

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What a great interesting way to celebrate the end of the stressful school year. Two London teachers allegedly tag teamed – as in threesome after school studies – a 16 year old student after some drinks at a local pub. No charges or complaints have been filed.

This kid is going to be idolized by his classmates when school starts again. Can anyone find any pictures of the two teachers? Now what would have happened to the teachers if this were stateside?

Update: Just answered my own question. Peter Donald Carne, a English teacher from a junior college on the Eastern sea board, filmed a threesome he had with two 16-year old students. Dumbass. Carne pleaded guilty to 10 seperate charges.

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It’s for alcoholics wanting to suckle on fake breasts.

A fully functional set of wearable breasts that dispense one shot of alcohol out of each nipple.

I’m getting the feeling that this little apparatus is bound to get seriously abused by drunk males infatuated with breasts.

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Things are a little slow on UES due to the July 4th holiday. As I prepare to head out to the beach, I felt it would be a sin for me not to share this link. The kind souls on FlickrBooty toil hours on end each day sifting through the thousands of images posted on Flickr. Their main criteria for acceptable images? Booty, booty, and um… breasts. Enjoy!

And for those of you celebrating today with your illegal fireworks, stay safe and responsible. It’s a shame to flip the television on to hear stories of accidental apartments – whole apartments – burning down due to irresponsible bitches kids with Roman Candles and other pyrotechnics. I’ll beat some ass if I ever see punks running away from a fire they probably started.

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I always thought learning a foreign langauge was would be easier if some sort of sex was involved. Sleeping Dictionary. Check out some of the pages from a 1980 Japanese English text book.

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Title explains everything. The archive contains a few lookers and a whole bunch of ergh… Well I’ll just say there isn’t any airbrushing done on these “models”.

I wonder if these girls even know that their “boyfriends” are posting these images? Who cares right? Just another site for the voyuer in all of us. While you’re at it, check out Vida Guerra.

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It’s real. Try the search for yourself. Now let’s see, did I want to search for “Paris Hilton is a whore?”