Cruise has spawned
This post was published 3 years 6 months 21 days ago and its content may not be valid anymore.Yawn! Honestly, this story means nothing to me. I just LOVED the writeup they did on JustJared
Welcome to Earth, Suri Cruise! Us lifeforms are called humans. Huuuuuu-maaaaaans. [Waves hello] Your journey was unexpectedly long but your parents, Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise, are proud to welcome you into this world as their first child, a bouncing baby girl. You weighed in at 7 lbs 7 oz and your name Suri means “princess” in Hebrew or “red rose” in Persian. You have two siblings from your father’s previous marriage to Nicole Kidman (she’s also an actress) — Isabella, 13, and Connor, 11, who were adopted as infants. This news comes the same exact day that your daddy’s sworn enemy, Brooke Shields, gave birth to her second child, a daughter named Grier Hammond Henchy. You can look forward to your daddy setting up many playdates for the two of you. Be excited! Congrats to you and your parents! TOM ‘N’ KATIE 4EVA!!
Could someone please tell me the obsession with this couch bouncing closet case?
If you find out, let me know. kthx.
Easy. We’s WEIRD! We like weirdness in celebs. Nay, we EXPECT it.
And I’ll go you one weirder: That name they gave the kid comes from Kabbalah.
It’s as if Scientology wasn’t ENOUGH weirdness. Gotta throw another celebrity cult in there, just to be safe. Gotta sell some magazine covers (and maybe some movie tickets while they’re at it…)
I read some post that Cruise wanted to eat the umbilical cord and drink the placenta after birth. I’m not sure if he actually ended up doing that. Anyone follow up?